Tuesday, February 10, 2009

4. Leila, untouchable

A week went by, and my friendship with Leila grew stronger.It was like she we're best friends, with definate undeniable extra feelings, as in more than friends. She was simply fantastic, in every way i can think of. She always managed to somehow brighten my day, no matter how dark it got. I enjoyed every single moment i was in her company, and when she wasn't around, she was always on my mind. But of course she wasn't the only one on my mind. What Rawan said in her text message never seemed to escape my thoughts. 'I love you'? Lately I have felt a little more for her, but I'm just beginning to like her, and she's already in love with me? It's too fast, I didn't even see her this way until lately, How am I going to face her when she's back?

After my last class, i stayed in the campus' starbucks. "One white chocolate mocha, grande please, thanks" i nodded with polite expression engraved on my face. then i went and sat in what is now my usual seat- facing the cashier. I sat there, seemed lifeless, sinking in my ocean of thoughts- till that was interrupted with a couple of cold hands covering my eyes.

"Guess who?"

"you're back!! 7imdilla 3al salama!!" i shouted at the top of my lungs. It was Rawan. I stood up facing her, god i missed that face. I sat her down, got her her usual java chip frappuccino. It felt so good to have her back. I never realised i missed her that much till i saw her at that very second. "meta raddaitay?"

"tawa ma 9arli two hours" she answered with the same smile i had on.

"why didn't you text or something? I would've come ilma6ar for you"

"mabi ata3bik, adri you classes ib hal wagt"

"shda3wa Rawan, ta3abich raa7a" i winked

We talked for a long while, in which the widest smile had never been erased off my face. As we headed to the end of our conversation i realised something that really confused me.

When i'm with Rawan, i completely forget about Leila; then again when i'm with Leila, i completely forget about Rawan. It was so weird, i liked them both very much, but they both had very different personalities. Rawan's the innocent, naive type. It was so cute how childlike she can act sometimes. She's just adorable. Leila's different. She's more of a thinker (over-thinker at occasions), really sarcastic. She can make me laugh so hard that whatever beverage i'm drinking, whilst yapping along with her, always seems to make it's way out of my nostrils. I loved being with both so much.

"hey, so listen i'm not done with you, wanna go get something to eat or something?" she said while we both stood up.

"haha yeah sure why not" i answered with a happy expression drawn on my face. I took the her jacket that was hung at the back of her seat, and put it on her. As i was doing so, i saw Leila way back, far away, standing there just looking at me. She had a look on her face that suggested i had cheated on her. I looked back at her. I waited for something, but nothing happened. After a minute or so she just left with that same look.

"yallaaa emsh" she pulled my arm and headed towards the door. Leila's look had me worried. What was that look? If it was any other girl i'd say she was jealous, but not Leila. She's different. Unique.

We hopped into my car, drove off with Leila's stare never escaped my thoughts. For some reason i didn't want Leila to think that i was 'with' Rawan. Maybe that was my answer. The answer to if i should ever 'be' with Rawan. Maybe it's better for us to stay as friends.

We ended up going to a fancy lebanese restaurant. We had a good time, not great- like times we had before she left. Don't get me wrong she was still her own remarkable self. It was me. I couldn't stop thinking about what happened.

I couldn't sleep that night. I stayed up all night thinking Leila, and what's she gonna say tomorrow. I left for uni early the following morning. I wanted to go talk to Leila, i wanted to go get things out in the clear- that Rawan is just a close friend, nothing more- at least thats what i thought. I went in through the glass doors and headed straight to her classroom. It had already begun, so i sat on the floor outside waiting for her. After a long hour her class ended and she got out. She saw me sitting on the floor looking at the door waiting for her to come out. She flashed away a half-a-smile and asked me to get up. "Come, walk with me big head"

"yeah well girls like it" i replied to her unnecessary remark, with a hint of cockiness

"well the girl yesterday sure seemed to like it" she looked at me, straight into my eyes.

"yeah, thats what i wanted to talk to you about" i began "she's a friend, thats all. I've known her since forever and..." i stopped for a moment, someone was behind her trying to grab my attention by waving. It was 3azooz. He was heading towards us.

"ha bo ya3goob 3ash min shaafik, shlooonik sha5baarik" he looked at Leila then at me. His smile grew big. He placed his huge arms around her and... "i see you met the future mrs. 3azeez" ...

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Grumpy Tag

1. pic of a grumpy person (or dog? lol)

2. 3 things that are just abnormal:
a) how when i start drawing, my tongue immediately comes out of my mouth in a ":p" postion
b) guys wearing pink?!
c) my little brother growing a beard at age 14!!
3. 2 things that irritate you:
a) when people go "haa" 3-4 times, n i have to repeat myself over n over
b) how sometimes i can't express myself well
4. a trigger to your anger
when i'm woken up '3a9ib, alarm clocks don't last long with me lol
5. 3 people you can't live without
a) my best friend
b) my parents
c) a couple of my cousins
6. 2 people you don't wanna see
a) my sharee3a prof (elective); seriously if i see this guy again, badish fee isijin
b) the guy that hit us with his car, caused us to flip over
7. one of your favorite foods
mm... pizza
8. 3 of your favorite songs
a) elliot yamin- wait for you
b) 112- nowhere
c) usher- i can't win
_ love;**
_ [MaDry-Shakw~]
_ nunu
_ Cinderella
_ Gutter Flower

Friday, February 6, 2009

3. "i love you"?

-a couple of days later-

"sorry gi6a3 il5a6 min kaifa, anyway i gtg like now, inzain shino tabi ayeeblik min geneva?"

"abi salamtich, hurry back". That is so cliche, but i really wanted her just to come back safely.

"5ala9 ma ra7 tgooli? I'm getting you something 3ala tho8i" she replied

"haha Rawano, 5ala9 illee yray7ich, troo7een w triddeen bessalama"

"allah ysalmik, and goodluck with your quiz today, yalla byee"

"thanks, bye hon" i hung up with a sad smile drawn on my unshaved face. I was really gonna miss her- i thought to myself.

I sat myself down on the most uncomfortable chair facing the Starbucks' cashier. It was so crowded! I was so lucky to have found myself a four seat table right away. I opened my 'Intro to Management' textbook, just to have a final look over the material for today's quiz.

As i opened the book my eyes caught the sight of Leila lining up to order something.

"i'll have a white chocolate mocha, venti please, thanks"

Interesting taste. She took her paper cup, paid, and turned around to look for place to sit. It was too crowded. I looked down at my book pretending to be engaged in my studying hoping she wouldn't recognize me- but secretly i really wanted her to share my table. She looked around waiting for someone to offer her a seat. A couple of minutes later, i felt her standing right across of me. I lifted up my head, looked directly into her eyes. I felt funny in my stomach. She was breathtaking.

"hala?" i began

She looked right at me with a funny expression engraved in her flawless face. She said nothing, placing her paper cup on my table and pulling out the chair across of me.

"you owe me" she chuckled

"so i guess that makes us even now" i replied with a ridiculously wide smile. She took a sip of her venti cup, looking directly through my shades. I tried escaping her look, but it i couldn't bring myself to do so.

"oh you're not even close" she finally said with a big smile showing her perfectly alligned teeth. I laughed nodding along. "haha i'm gonna use this a lot"

"hahaha don't make a habit of it" i mumbled out, looking back into my book pretending to study.

Silence had built up between us, and the noises in the background took over. A while later that was broken, "so what're you studying?" she said, desperately trying to start up a conversation- thank god she did!
i held up my text book, pointing at the title with my pinky. "Oh, so what is it for? Quiz?" And thats all we needed to start up the legendary conversation we had.

We talked for 3 straight hours. It was by far, the most amazing conversation i have ever had with someone, which led me to completely forget about my quiz. She was smart, interesting and funny. We made each other laugh, we got along so well. It was like we knew ba3a'6 since forever.
Everytime i saw her smile, or i made her laugh, my heart skips a couple of beats. It was the weirdest thing. Am i into her? I just met her that can't be- but why does my heart keep doing that stupid thing every time she smiles at me? I've never felt like towards anyone that i've known this long.

"umm sorry, but you do realize you missed your quiz, right?" she interrupted me bni9 salfiti

"9ij??" truth is i knew, but i was having too much fun talking to her. "and you're just telling me that?" i said with a half-a-smile indicating my concern for the missed quiz.

"well... umm... aah" she replied with an embarrassed expression.

"i thought that was MY catch-phrase" i interrupted saving her from that awkward moment. She laughed

"don't worry about it, this professor won't be so hard on you, just make up an excuse and he'll let you take it at some time" she said with a comforting tone on her voice.

"we both know by now thats not my thing, you mind helping me out with that?"

"haha oh right, okay- 'family emergency', simple, hard to forget and won't draw in too many questions" she assured me with a big grin on her face.

"yeah? you think so? okay i better be going now" i said as i stood up. I collected and piled my books on top of each other. "alright Leilo, i'ma go talk to that prof now, hope your excuse works or you're gonna pay, i'll see you next class" I, unconciously, winked again- thank god my shades were on- cuz i wouldn't want her to get the wrong idea about me. I still blushed for doing so, and i know she realized the much too visible blush on my cheeks.

I walked away with nothing on my mind but Leila. She was great, perfect in every way. Her personality was fantastic. For some reason i looked back to catch a final glimpse of her. She was staring in my direction, looked away as soon as i saw her look at me. I smiled then i carried on with my way to the professor's office.

And like she said, 'family emergency' was the perfect excuse. The professor only wished me goodluck with it and agreed to let me do my quiz later. I was so grateful to Leila, i'll thank her later- i thought. As i left the campus i felt my cell phone vibrating. i took it out and saw 3 missed calls and one text message from Rawan.

text message: "y rn't u picking up? :( ... i guess u're doing ur quiz... i just wanted to say... i love you"

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

2. Leila vs Rawan

After a LONG hour, that dull professor finally announced the end of his lecture. I was too busy thinking about leila and how she took the fall for me like that, that everytime the prof opened his mouth nothing but gibberish came out. I stood up piling my books together. I turned my face towards her. I still hadn't seen what she looks like, and i gotta say curiousity was eating me up inside.

So i walked towards her "e7m" i pretended to clear up my throat.

"yeahh thats very subtle" she said sarcastically while stuffing her colored pens in her huge bag- still not facing me, "if you wanna get my attention, you know my name already, how about you try calling me by it?"

Wise-ass!- i thought to myself. "okay leila... " she finally faced my "umm... aaah... mm.."

"you're not much of a talker are you" she interruped with half a smile drawn on her perfectly round face.

"I would be if you let me finish a sentence once or twice" i replied with a cheeky grin.

her half smile grew into a full one "aah finally a sentence! I would if i had an ounce of certainty that you'd finish one this century."

Malsoona! "ahuh... anyway," i said, totally ignorning her wise-ass remark, "i just wanted to thank you again for doing what you did, i really appreciate it"

"Don't sweat it, you do owe me though" she finally smiled sincerely, looking directly in my eyes which got me weak in the knees.

"umm... yeahh i do" i managed to blurt out. "Alright... i'll catch you next class" i said as i left the class, and just before i left, i stood there looked at her just organizing her stuff, piling her books. She felt i was looking and lifted up her head- our eyes locked, i panicked. I smiled and winked at her then left.

WHY DID I WINK?! - i thought. I was furious with myself for doing so.

"YASSOOOOOOF!!" yelled a voice so loud that it made me jump right up. That voice was very familiar i looked behind me. "3AZOOOZ!" i yelled without even thinking! And without even thinking we hugged. Confused me later after doing so.

3azooz is my "9adee8 e6ifoola". His house was right across ours, we went to the same school, hung out after school and everything, but when highschool came, we drifted apart. Him and his family left to live in America- his dad was preparing for his P.h.D.

We sat down in Starbucks, talked for hours. It was so good to have him back, he's such a decent friend. It was his second year here in this university- kinda took my by surprise. Why didn't i know he was back? How come he never told me? Oh well. "isma3 ywaiisif, etha tabi ay shay la yriddik illa lsaanik w la testi7i inta a3az min o5ooy w i know you know that. Ana mashi, 3indi Media al7een and i'm already late" he chuckled, "taamer 3ala shay?"

"salamtik, allah weyyak". He left and i sat down thinking about the old days with good ol' 3azooz. Suddenly i felt the vibration of my cell in my pocket. 'rawan calling'.

"hala rawaan, aamray"

"hala w '3ala ... e6la3 barra il campus ana naa6ritik". Weird, but i didn't have anything better to do and my next class was in 3 hours time, so i took all my books and headed out.
There she stood, leaning against her pepsi-blue Touareg. She looked incredible. Long, dark brown hair, big Versace shades that circled her perfectly structured face, and her tiny little mouth drawing a wide smile- well as wide as it can go. At that moment, i didn't know why i didn't feel anything towards her, she could be the best girlfriend. She's funny, smart and caring- and she's always been there for me. I stood there, just looking directly through her shades; smiling. "We're going for 3a9eer, 3ala 7saabik" she said with a giggle as she threw me her keys.

"okay so i guess i'm driving" i replied

"of course! Since when do you trust me behind the wheel?"

"well do you blame me?" i teased . "yassoooof, shut up" she pouted, as we both got into her car.

"haha... so the weirdest thing happened today..." i began as i started the car, "i was very late to class..."

"haha bedayat'ha chithee?" she replied while adjusting her make up

"ee, i walked in with this girl," that statement caught her attention, she turned her face in my direction, "and the prof asked me wain kent w i panicked cuz i could never make up an excuse on the spot, and this girl, leila, she selflessly took the fall for me."

"leila ha? ya7lailha" she forced out a smile. At that moment she gave off a vibe i've never felt before. She was jealous. Rawan's the most confident girl i know, she's NEVER jealous. That was first time i saw her like that, it stirred something inside of me. That fake smile was a7la smile i've seen plastered on her face. The silence filled the air for a while.

"Rawan?" I broke the silence with huge grin

"3yoonha" she turned her head with the same fake smile she had plastered on

i pinched cheek dimple "you're really beautiful, u know that?"...

Monday, February 2, 2009

1. Late Start

Here i am, laying on bed without a pillow nor a blanket, eyes wide open. I looked at my cell phone to check what time it was- ugh two hours till the alarm goes off. See my reputation as a sleeper was legendary, but not today. My eyelids never shut once. Suddenly i could feel my mobile vibrating in my hand. Mino bedig hal 7azza? i thought to myself. I looked at it "rawan is calling"- ugh what does she want now?! Rawan is a girl i met through a friend of mine; really nice girl but she had misinterpreted our friendship. I don't have anything against her i just wasn't ready for a relationship and everytime i try to explain to her she'd play dumb so with time i just gave up.

"aloo?" i tried to sound like i was asleep

"hala... rise and shine yassoof you're gonna be late for your first day" man she's got a nice voice to wake up to- i thought to myself as i got up

"Rawan it's 6.30! My first class doesn't start till 9!" i said with a semi-sharp tone

"oh 9a7" she giggled, "i just like it when you sound all sleepy" trying to justify her calling hal 7azza

"yeah thanks, listen rayan i'ma go take a quick shower... i'll catch you later ok?"

"okay call me lamma t5alli9... i wanna tell you what to wear"

Lazga! But again she does have a good taste, so this might not be the worst idea, "okay yeah sure, bye now"

"bye 7abeebi"- she hung up.

Again with the 7abeebi?? I don't know meta hal bnayya btefham enna she's like my sister. I don't wanna sound harsh cuz i don't wanna lose her, she's a very good friend and a very nice girl. Oh well- i thought as i turned the hot water on. I looked at myself in the mirror for a while. My hair was getting long and i hated fixing it everytime i woke up. I held it back to see how i looked if i garra3t. "not so bad" i said to myself confidently. I took my shaving machine, set it on 2 and shaved all of my hair off. I wiped the steam off the mirror with my arm to catch a glimpse of my 'new look'. "not bad" i mumbled. I then hopped inside the shower with scolding hot water pouring on my body- just perfect.

i got out, dried myself, took my phone and called rayan. "so tell me miss fashion, shalbis?" i said with a more cheerful tone- a hot shower always managesto cheer me up somehow- only god knows laish

"hahaha okay yalla- by the way a one-hour-45-minute shower is not a 'quick' shower... ilmohim, i was thinking talbis your navy lacoste t-shirt - the size medium one not large..."

"ma frigaw, they look the same" i interrupted. "no they don't you're gonna have trust me on that yassoof" she said sounding a bit too serious, "ma3a your light-colored jeans and your white nikes". Simple enough i thought.
"okay thanks yalla b-" i tried to end the phone call

"no wait!! aloo? alooo yousef?" ...i stayed in silence. "yousefff waiinek?" i could actually hear her pouting.

"ha rawan kani... na3am?"

"elbis your black aviator ray bans!" she said with a hint of excitement in her voice.

"okay inshalla... tabeen shay?" "no salamtek, goodluck on your first day... try not to get thrown out of this university too" she said

"i'll try" i remarked with sarcasm "yalla bye" and i hung up

I then drowned myself with Dior's Fahrenheit and got outa my room, passed by the dining room where my mom was having breakfast, kissed her and left home. I started my car then looked at the clock. SHIT 6 MINUTES TO GO!! I raced through the cars ignorning a couple of red lights and finally i was there! i quickly got out of the car, ran to the classrooms.

I looked for room 206. After a couple of minutes of searching i found it. As i got in a girl came in with me. I didn't even look at her cuz i was in too much of a hurry. We both got in. The class was full, dead silent and the tall pale proffessor turned his head towards me and that girl.

"late on your first day? not the best start isn't it? mr. yousef i'm assuming and ms. ... leila?" he said with an English accent
"well aah... i was... umm" i tried to come up with an excuse, but nothing came out. i couldn't say i took a long shower that would be simply embarrassing. I froze there wishing the ground would open up and swallow me.

"i'm sorry sir, i had some unfinished papers to hand in to the administration and yousef here helped me with them, i take total blame for being late, he had nothing to do with it" she interrupted with a perfect american accent. The proffessor took a moment. "you're off the hook the both of you, don't make it a habit though"

We both nodded and then took a seat at the end of the classroom- i sat behind her. "hey listen..." i whispered, she leaned back with her head indicatingthat she's listening, "i owe you, big time" i said with great gratitude.
"yeah you do" she smiled...

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